


There Can Be Only One

by writtenthroughtime



Series: WTT's Posts for ImagineClaireandJamie [9]
Category: Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: Canon Divergence AU, F/M, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-16
Updated: 2016-05-16
Packaged: 2018-06-08 20:29:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6872323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writtenthroughtime/pseuds/writtenthroughtime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt: Imagine Claire goes back slightly earlier just before Jamie leaves for Edinburgh while still living with Laoghaire. I</p>
            </blockquote>





	There Can Be Only One

“You married her?!” I fumed, clenching my fists so I didn’t slap him, “Her? Of all people, you married the one person who wanted, more than anything, to see me dead!”

I paced the small upstairs guest bedroom at Lallybroch, deliberately avoiding items that could and would cause harm if used as projectiles.

“Claire,” Jamie said pleadingly. I simply glared back at him; he didn’t try to continue.

“I don’t know why of all the women in the world you would marry that vapid, selfish, child!” I paced faster, my hair coming loose from its ties.

Huffing, I dug my fingers through my hair and pulled pin after pin out, pelting them at Jamie—whether they made contact with him or not I wasn’t sure, but the act made me feel better.

“Christ! Did ye think I wanted to remarry?” Jamie said as he got up and gripped the tops of my arms, “I didna want to wed anyone but you, Sassenach, but you weren’t here!”

“And whose fault is that?” I yelled, my face inches away from his. “I didn’t want to leave, but did you listen? No! You sent me back so that I could have our child out of their own time, away from her father, being raised by a man I no longer loved and could barely stomach to look at! Do you know what it was like knowing you were dead? That I’d never get to see you again, speak to you, touch you again!”

He opened his mouth to most likely say he did know what it was like, but I cut him off. “You were dead, Jamie! Dead! In 1948 you had been dead for over 200 years and I had to live with that fact, raise a child without you, knowing she’d never know you! Christ, Jamie! I wasn’t even allowed to tell her about you!”

Tears began to stream down my face, half in sadness half in anger. His grip on my arms lessened.

“She? A lass? I have a daughter?” His voice was just above a whisper, his hands shook on me and his eyes were full of wonder.

I nodded. “Yes, you have a daughter. I’ll tell you more about her if I don’t kill you first, after we discuss this…this shambles of a relationship you now have made!”

“Sassenach—”

“Don’t call me that! Not right now. I’m too mad at you.” I pulled away from his grip and gaze, stared out the window. Lallybroch was full of life, the spring planting in full swing.

“Did you ever once think of what she did to me before you wed her?” I whispered, my mind taking me back to the thieves hole and witch trial at Cranesmuir.

“I dinna ken what ye mean, Sass—Claire.”

I turned to face him, tears still streaming down my face. “She’s the one who had me arrested at Cranesmuir. I was on trial as a witch because of _her_. She wanted me dead, Jamie, so she could have you.”

His mouth gaped open like a fish gasping for water. “I didna—I never would have—Christ mo nighean donn, I’m so sorry!”

Next thing I knew, he was pulling me to his chest, soothing his hand down my back.

“How could you have married her? How?” I pleaded into his chest.

“I didna ken what she had done to ye, Claire. Ye have, and always will be the only one I truly love, mo ghraidh,” Jamie sighed heavily through his nose, “It was Jenny.”

I jumped in his arms, not sure how to take this information. “She was the one who arranged the marriage, ye ken? But I went through wi’ it. So the fault lies on me, no her.”

My temper was back, the woman who was the sister I never had, the one who I thought would do everything to take care of Jamie, betrayed us. I pushed back from Jamie’s chest, but his arms stayed tight across me, unwilling to let me go.

“How could she? Why would she think that you would be suitable for Laoghaire MacKenzie?!” I was yelling.

“Calm down, Sassenach.”

I glared at him and his soothing tones.

“I will not calm down! Your sister threw you into the hands of the worst person imaginable!”

“She thought I needed a woman, aye? I was a miserable sight after ye left, mo nighean donn. I hadna had a woman to love and call my own since you. Jenny was trying to make me happy…or more so, less miserable.”

“She was trying to make you happy? Is that why I caught you early in the morning on a fully packed horse? You were leaving because you were so happy?!”

He winced, “I didna say I was happy. I went through wi’ it because I wanted to make Jenny happy.”

“Did you have sex with her?”

“What? Wi’ Jenny, Christ, Claire no!”

“Not with Jenny, with Laoghaire. Did you have sex with her?”

He nodded, “Aye, I did. Let me tell ye something Sassenach before ye try to push me away.” I was trying, I started wiggling intently to get out of his grasp at the thought of him lying with her. My insides rolled and I was ready to throw up.

“I was making love to you, but it wasna the same…there was no pleasure, I—I didna see her as herself, I can only ever see you. No matter the woman or the occasion, I can only see you.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” I challenged.

“It’s no’ like ye didna have sex with Frank when ye left! It’s been nearly twenty years Claire. It’s no’ like you to remain celibate!”

“I—I did, in times of utter loneliness. I never enjoyed it. It almost felt like a chore, and afterwards…” I trailed off shaking my head, “Afterwards it felt as though my heart had been ripped out because it wasn't you beside me!”

Jamie opened his mouth to continue and the door slammed open, bouncing off the walls. We both winced at the sound and sudden intrusion.

“There ye are James Fraser! How dare ye sneak out of the house!” The childlike screech of Laoghaire MacKenzie—Fraser’s voice cut through the air.

Jamie let his head fall back and a groan emit from his mouth. She couldn’t see me from this angle, but I wasn’t going to let that last for long. I stepped out from Jamie’s arms as he turned to face her, and I took my rightful place at his side.

“What is she doing here?” Laoghaire spit out, her eyes narrowing, and her stance tensing.

“I can bloody well be here if I want to. It is you that is not wanted in this room,” I glared back, squaring my shoulders and looking down at her from my nose.

“You canna tell me—”

“Why are ye here, Laoghaire?” Jamie asked, cutting her off mid squeal.

She huffed and crossed her arms over her chest, “To bring ye home. Ye canna just leave in the middle o’ the night to do as ye please, James Fraser!”

Jamie’s brow furrowed, and I laughed. “I dinna take yer meaning, Laoghaire. Ye seem to be tellin’ me what I can and can no’ do and that’s no’ yer place. I can go where I please and ye canna do a thing about it.”

Laoghaire screamed in rage and charged at me. “This is all your fault, ye witch! Ye should have burned at Cranesmuir like the witch Geillis Duncan!”

Her hands clawed at my face, arms and chest. At first, I was shocked she actually attacked me, then I pushed her aside and slapped her across the face as hard as I could. Her hand came up to her cheek in shock, then she tried to kick me. I tightened my hand into a fist, careful to leave my thumb out and punched her in the nose as hard as I could. There was a faint popping crunch, and blood poured down out of Laoghaire’s nose.

She wailed—screeched— out in pain and anger. “Look what ye’ve done to me! To my dress! Jamie surely ye canna let her get away wi’ this?”

Jamie was hiding a grin and a laugh behind his hand; his shoulders shook with the effort. “Aye, I can. I see she was in the right of it. Ye attacked her Laoghaire, she only acting in a way to prevent you from continuing.”

That was not what she wanted to hear. Laoghaire screamed again, this time coming at me with balled up fists. I took advantage of the tears that would be clouding her vision and stepped to the side, letting her own momentum trip her up. She fell to the ground with a crash, but not without hitting her newly broken nose of the corner of the ornately carved wooden chair sitting in the corner of the room.

She sat in the floor, a puddle of snot, blood and tears mixing on her face and dripping onto her already ruined dress.

“Ye always ruin everything! The moment ye arrived ye stole him from me, and now yer here, after I married him and stealing him away again!”

I crouched down, and against my better judgement, handed her a handkerchief. “I didn’t steal Jamie from anyone. He was and never will be a possession to own. I fell in love with him and he, against all odds, fell in love with me. It was never anything to spite you. All the strife you’ve caused and endured has been your own doing.” I stood, brushing my hands against my skirts and placed them on my hips looking down at her. “Now that I am here, I’m taking up my rightful place as Jamie’s wife. You are the one who does not belong.”

“But you left him! Ye gave him up! He’s mine!” She screamed.

“Enough!” Jamie’s voice rang out across the room. “I am no yer’s Laoghaire and I never was. I am sorry for the way our marriage has been, but with Claire back ye can see that we canna be wed. Claire didna leave me, I thought she was dead and she I. There was no false doings from either of us.” He went over and helped the still bleeding and sobbing girl to her feet.

“If ye go downstairs I’m sure Jenny and young Mrs. Crook will help ye get cleaned up before sending ye on yer way home.”

With that, he ushered her out of the door and closed it behind her.

For now, Laoghaire was gone, but for how long I wondered.

Jamie crossed the room and sat on the bed, his face wrinkled in concentration. He took a deep breath. “Now, tell me about my lassie. Does she look like you or me, Sassenach? What is she like?”

I smiled at him and made my way to sit next to him. He didn’t agree with my decision and pulled me onto his lap, burying is face into my hair.

“Her name is Brianna Ellen…”


End file.
